The first banned user

[rawTOP]

There was a user here who just sorta didn't fit in. His posts were a bit preachy and adversarial - definitely out of step with everyone else on the site. Whenever I saw he had posted, I'd groan wondering what he'd said now. I really don't mind different, contrary perspectives, but they have to be presented in a logical, respectful manner. His weren't.

To be clear, I'm all for difficult discussions - whether that be STDs, or the difficulties of being poz. In fact I'd love to see more poz guys talk about the hassles of being poz. I've got friends who spend weeks in the hospital and I suspect it's 'cause of complications related to HIV, but not sure... I really wish poz guys would discuss that side of being poz more. That's the stuff bug chasers need to hear to really make an informed decision.

Anyway, the member in question asked me to delete his account and go surgically through the threads he'd participated in and delete posts that didn't create holes in the discussion. That was too much work, so I just banned him. Banning him is less permanent. If he wants to come back and participate in a civil manner, he's welcome and he'll be reinstated.

The vast majority of you are great and you guys have really created a wonderfully supportive community here with your input. As that grows just know I'll be on top of it and people who are disruptive will be given a chance, and then either have their access limited to non-controversial parts of the site or they'll be banned completely.

[komfort570]

I think most poz guys just dont like to talk about the bad stuff. The Daily Meds..having to worry everytime someone has a cold. For me my biggest worry is becoming injured and making sure I alert someone to my status. A year ago I was playing softball and took a hopper right to my noes. Needless to say I busted my nose and was gushing blood everywhere. I had to act like I didnt need help and keep everyone away while I found a towel and then had a friend drive me to the hospital. I wont even go into how the hospital staff treats you after they find out you are poz. I am a relatively healthy person but it definitely has taken some away from me. Many say being Poz is just so freeing...but I am here to tell you there is nothing freeing about being poz..you are just a slave to a different master after you become poz...

[rawTOP]

I think most poz guys just dont like to talk about the bad stuff. The Daily Meds..having to worry everytime someone has a cold. For me my biggest worry is becoming injured and making sure I alert someone to my status. A year ago I was playing softball and took a hopper right to my noes. Needless to say I busted my nose and was gushing blood everywhere. I had to act like I didnt need help and keep everyone away while I found a towel and then had a friend drive me to the hospital. I wont even go into how the hospital staff treats you after they find out you are poz. I am a relatively healthy person but it definitely has taken some away from me. Many say being Poz is just so freeing...but I am here to tell you there is nothing freeing about being poz..you are just a slave to a different master after you become poz...

See, that's the sorta input I think is really helpful (as opposed to the guy who got banned)... Non-judgmental, personal, and honest...

I really do think neg guys who are considering becoming poz need to hear more stuff like that. Poz guys are largely silent about their lives. If they were just more open about the little stuff I think it would change people's perceptions - and not so much in a bad way. Despite what people think of me I really don't think barebacking is right for everyone. The ones on the fence need to hear the honest truth. Only poz guys can really give those details... It's not something I can do for them - I can just provide the platform for them to talk about their lives...